NML played against 3,000 of them in college
But lately, I've discovered there's a new scourge on my beloved game that I simply cannot tolerate: Americans.
Understand that I'm not talking about the vast majority of you, who still regard soccer as a distinctly European product of dubious worth, like espadrilles or universal health care.
I don't begrudge fans here who have only recently awakened to the charms of what the rest of the world has long known as the beautiful game. Welcome to the party!
The problem is your soccer obsessives. By my reckoning, they may be the most derivative, excessive and utterly ridiculous collection of sports fans on the planet.
If you've ever stumbled across this tribe as they spill out of a bar on Saturday mornings after 90 minutes spent watching a game contested by two teams based thousands of miles away, you'll know the sort of fans I'm talking about.
They refer to the sport as "fútbol," hold long conversations about the finer points of the 4-4-2 formation and proudly drape team scarves around their necks even when the temperature outside is touching 90 degrees.
It is this band of soccer junkies who have turned the simple pleasure I used to derive from heading to a bar to watch a game into something more akin to undergoing root canal surgery.
It's not that they all have the same stories about study-abroad trips to Europe, or that they get wildly excited about the simplest saves, or even, for inexplicable reasons, that 90% of soccer fans in the U.S. seem to root for Arsenal.
My biggest gripe is that all of this feels like an elaborate affectation.
Instead of watching the game in the time-honored way of American sports fans—by thrusting a giant foam finger in the air, say, or devouring a large plate of Buffalo wings—your soccer fanatics have taken to aping the behavior of our fans from across the pond.
At home is much better.
An occasional soccer match at the pub on Saturday morning is fun, but not as a frequent occurrence. I don't even mind the fans in the pub chanting/singing......it's the faux British accents they insert that make me want to stab them with a butter knife.
And the fabricated rivalries or hooliganism of the MLS, right?
dumber than hateful rivalries is "respectful" rivalries like notre dame/usc and florida state/miami. barffffffff
At home is much better.
An occasional soccer match at the pub on Saturday morning is fun, but not as a frequent occurrence. I don't even mind the fans in the pub chanting/singing......it's the faux British accents they insert that make me want to stab them with a butter knife.
The problem with this is that these people are imitating the accent of a bunch of no brained fucking racist idiot dickmonkeys.
I actually know more about soccer than I thought I did, but I'm intentionally DERP ignant American watching soccer at bars just to ruffle some feathers.
Why would anyone accept a call up to the England squad?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...dgy-hair-lucrative-ad-deals-pouting-WAGS.html
Why would anyone accept a call up to the England squad?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...dgy-hair-lucrative-ad-deals-pouting-WAGS.html
i honestly enjoy the group stage play in these major tournaments. i'm never nearly as interested in the knockout round.
beat your opponent in real soccer play time or gtfo. rules should be changed so both teams are eliminated if 130 minutes ends in a tie. shootouts are the worst.
i don't think they're exciting. just kind of random to be honest. exciting would be teams frantically trying to actually score in regulation so they don't have to be eliminated.Penalties are exciting, but a shitty way to bow out of a tournament.
After 120 minutes, they should use AYSO U7 pop-up goals, and play 3 v 3 on a mini field.
i don't think they're exciting. just kind of random to be honest. exciting would be teams frantically trying to actually score in regulation so they don't have to be eliminated.