Mr. Radpants
Trog Five Standing By
Latest on Pac Men Organizational Strategies, Contracts.
In recent seemingly humble blog posts, Las Vegas GM Doh shed some light on his organizational strategy for the Las Vegas Pac Men.
GM Doh targets to make the playoffs only. By today’s standards, this is considered to be an outdated strategy more fitting to ancient MLB playoff scenarios, first documented 43 years ago in the book Moneyball by Michael Lewis. However, Doh appears to be coming around, crediting constantly semi-inactive yet genius GM Rad for explaining the lack of intricacies of OOTP playoffs: “My idea (which @Mr. Radpants is starting to sway me to not believe) is that if you get to the playoffs it is a crap shoot as long as you have a good enough team.”
Additionally, GM Doh claims to never overpay for free agents; however, he has been one of the most active salary shoppers in WBL/UBL history. Twitter and social media has exploded in reductio ad absurdum. Several theories are flying about GM Doh’s statement. The obvious -- Doh is delusional and didn’t notice that he’s in budget trouble every single year. The opposing theory is that he is an insane genius and has created a false caricature of himself, thus creating a sub-market for salary dumping in his trades.
One GM, under the promise of anonymity, lamented: “All this time GM Doh appeared in salary trouble. I ate some contracts just to get trades through. It’s possible that he was one step ahead of me the entire time, projecting a false financial stupidity and banking on my laziness for checking up on actual OOTP financials. I have a job and kids, I didn't expect deception to this level in an online baseball league.”
“I’ll never trade with the bastard again,” he added.
Another GM spoke off the record to WBLTR.com and confided that, “Another GM and I had conversations about GM Doh and we agreed that he was a functional retard when it came to salary commits. The guy was constantly in the red and pinging the commissioner office with confusion about the OOTP economic system. Now we see him publicly bragging about his fiscal responsibility and ability to dump bad contracts. I’m wondering if it was a long con. We’re having the SABR guys look into their salary commitments and matching them up against public statements. They have Nutopia on one monitor and Excel on the other and they look exhausted.”