Copy of Larry Culpepper Golden Wax Vagina Trophy Championship - Ohio State v. Oregon

[Travis7401]

When big mong QB truck sticked the NT to get that first down, the game was effectively over because EA got it right all those years ago with the "momentum switch." That play made Oregon's entire defense say "OH MY FUCK, how can we ever stop them" (without them gifting us the ball). After that all of OSU players were borderline unstoppable and Oregon's players became plebes. Contrast that with the first drive of the game where Tyner trucked over OSU's vaunted LBs on a couple of straight plays and OSU defenders looked borderline shell shocked. Unfortunately for Oregon, their WRs made plebe mistakes on the first few drives and that momentum switch clicked over the other way.

The momentum switch did briefly flick back to the middle with the Ghost fumble, and if Oregon managed to score a TD at that point and take the lead, the momentum switch flips in their favor and they probably win the game (maybe in blowout fashion if OSU players react wrong). Instead Oregon is held to a field goal and Gigantor and his pals get back on the field starting with neutral momentum and then take it right to Oregon to get back into God Mode for the rest of the game.

That's one thing I love about college football, and why I'm so excited for the inevitable 8 team playoff. No matter what definitive hot takes pundits have about which team would beat which other team, they fail to recognize the fundamental truth that the mental fragility of 18-22 year old men makes any outcome possible among the relatively level competition at the top end of CFB.

 

[kella]

Travis you do realize that Ohio State basically ran your NCAA 2010 mong offense with that horrible ogre from ATM

 

[Travis7401]

Travis you do realize that Ohio State basically ran your NCAA 2010 mong offense with that horrible ogre from ATM

That's why I love it. How frustrating was it to finally slow me down enough to force 3rd and 7, knowing that Jerrod Johnson will just use his massive number of pixels to fall forward for 4 yards on third down and then repeat the same thing on 4th.

That was the year I only ran 6 plays on offense and there was really only one person who could beat me regularly (@PSUEagle). And that was only because his offense was unstoppable and the gentleman's rules kept me from going for it on 4th down in certain circumstances (and outlawed the pump fake glitch, my other standby). I had MR. OPTION's number with Jerrod Johnson, lol.

Corch Irving Meyer understands the trollface mong king offense, hell he practically invented it.

Makes me want to fire up NCAA 2010 GLORY DAYS

 

[Ander1345]

But can it beat the 4 Verts offense?

 

[Travis7401]

But can it beat the 4 Verts offense?

That was one of my 6 plays.

Shotgun Spread (flex?)

Runs
Speed Option (Run as QB Dive)
HB Dive
Triple Option (used this as zone read, never pitched)

Passes
Slant flats
4 Verts
Smash

 

[Ander1345]

No FL Dig, not legit.

Also, it's all about that RNS Switch Smash.

 

[Travis7401]

I honestly didn't throw the ball much unless someone gave me a hot read. Against even number or better in the box I ran that QB dive ad infinitum. @kella knows, he felt the pain.

 

[Ander1345]

That's the beauty of the spread though. Pick your poison. If someone is going to try to gang tackle big pappa Jerrod you just throw to the flats.

 

[kella]

It was incredibly frustrating that year because I ran Cincinnati's offense with Tony Pike and would score in about 6 plays, max, every drive, unless it was a pick or fumble. And then Travis would chew up an entire quarter with that nonsense.

 

[Ander1345]

Back when you had to load up every teams playbook in practice so you could find a playbook you liked.

 

[Brick]

i think it also helped that jones is dumb. i don't think he felt the pressure or tried to force anything the entire game. most qbs would have a complete meltdown.

took jt barrett some time before he started beep-boopin'

you could tell jones was doing just exactly as corch told him: "ok if this guy isn't open, just start running". he also expected to win and didn't look like he felt any pressure.

no footbaw school classes needed.

 

[Ander1345]

He also had a ton of time in the pocket.

 

[Hachiko]

 

[DeadMan]

i think it also helped that jones is dumb. i don't think he felt the pressure or tried to force anything the entire game. most qbs would have a complete meltdown.

took jt barrett some time before he started beep-boopin'

you could tell jones was doing just exactly as corch told him: "ok if this guy isn't open, just start running". he also expected to win and didn't look like he felt any pressure.

no footbaw school classes needed.

I don't know, he also fit in a couple of really nice throws against Oregon's zone. Granted, Oregon rushing 3 made that easier to do, but there 4-5 throws that were something you'd never expect a 3rd string QB to make.

 

[Travis7401]

i think it also helped that jones is dumb. i don't think he felt the pressure or tried to force anything the entire game. most qbs would have a complete meltdown.

took jt barrett some time before he started beep-boopin'

you could tell jones was doing just exactly as corch told him: "ok if this guy isn't open, just start running". he also expected to win and didn't look like he felt any pressure.

no footbaw school classes needed.

That's why I always fucking loved Tebow. He was too dumb to ever be rattled. Like a Golden Retriever playing fetch. He doesn't get sad when you trick him by faking to throw the ball, he just believes the ball is going to be thrown every single time no matter how many times you mess with him. The ball will get thrown again soon and I will retrieve it and I will be happy. Tebow could throw 500 incompletions or get smeared in the backfield or whatever, but eventually it was going to be the 4th quarter and he was still sure he was going to win and the doubt would creep into the other team and then sure enough the magic happened.

I hate having smart QBs like manning who fold like a wet noodle when the first snap of the game goes over their head. The whole fucking super bowl was undone by one bad snap because Peyton's God-like mind could not handle such a plebe mistake. He'd sit on the bench and pout about how life isn't fair and how his superior intellect should be winning the game for them if their teammates wouldn't make stupid mistakes.

I don't want smart footbaw players, give me some mongoloid who believes skittles give him super powers (and a coaching staff who understands and values the mongoloid). Yes Marshawn, the skittles do turn you into Beast Mode! I don't care how dumb it sounds as long as he believes it. This is why Vince Young and Tebow would have been NFL gods if their coaches knew enough to stay out of their fucking way with trying to "convert them to the pro game." Nope, just run 6 plays and let that magical dumb asshole troll you all the way to victory.

 

[Ander1345]

"You don't get angry when you lose because you want to win. You get angry because you feel like you shouldn't lose."

 

[Irishman]

I pretty much live for @Travis7401's Tebow/mong offense posts. Today has been a gold mine.

 

[Brick]

oregon's version of that was jeremiah masoli.

 

[Brick]

every time they zoomed in on jones' face i took a sip of whiskey. rage.

i actually was about 40 minutes behind reel game time because i paused and got pissed and did a bunch of chores around the house, trying to convince myself it wasn't over.

 

[Brick]

the good thing is i didn't see a commercial or any of halftime. pissed i missed THERE ARE NO STRINGS ON ME doe.

 

[Ander1345]

oregon's version of that was jeremiah masoli.

No one could stop him until he decided he wanted to move to Robber.

 

[Mame YO]

Pausing might have been a good idea. Ma'whiskey was gone at halftime

 

[Brick]

masoli's effort against ohio state in the rose bowl: 9/21 for 81 yards and an interception

 

[Ander1345]

Still scored more points than the 2014 Chicago Bears

 

[Southpaw]

Did Jeff Gordon at least get to eat cold papa johns off a golf cart?

 

[DanishDonut0]

Damn this game. Still a fun season, not sure how we could ever get back. We need a mong or atholeeeete pipeline.

 

[Brick]

Damn this game. Still a fun season, not sure how we could ever get back. We need a mong or atholeeeete pipeline.

need to get better matchups in the title game.

it's hard to beat a team with nearly the same offensive scheme when you can't match their talent. true vs auburn and ohio state.

have to face a team like florida state who has no experience defending that shit.

although offense wasn't the problem last night. i mean at least in terms of moving the ball. oregon wasn't having trouble. ohio state made the red zone stops. just a bad game after the first drive with shitty mistakes. although ohio state for sure played the best defensive game any team has against oregon this year, short of arizona. they just have better players on D. and also they were good for knowing what was coming a few plays a drive. couldn't trick them.

 

[goblue96]

Only one solution: 12 game season followed by a 64 team double elimination tournament.

 

[Ander1345]

Yeah, hard to blame the O, there was drops, but Mariotta was Mariotta.

Run game didn't do so hot though.

 

[Brick]

and i find it funny that everyone is touting OSU as proving they belonged over tcu or baylor. it's not validation.

oh, one of the top teams in the country is capable of beating two other top teams? whale oil beef hooked.

either baylor or tcu could have done the same thing.

 

[Brick]

Yeah, hard to blame the O, there was drops, but Mariotta was Mariotta.

Run game didn't do so hot though.

mariota didn't break free for the 2 or 3 huge burst runs he gets every game on read or triple option plays. credit to tOSU being familiar with the scheme IMO.

tyner was awesome, actually. he played well. freeman hesitated too much, which is unlike him.

 

[Travis7401]

I pretty much live for @Travis7401's Tebow/mong offense posts. Today has been a gold mine.

If you think my Tebow Schtick is relentless on here, you should see me with my work colleagues.

On Friday we were talking about the game and I said "I'm not even going to watch, I'm just going to go ice fishing because I can't take watching another Peyton Manning angry dad face Meltdown making me long for the days of Tebow." Everyone laughed at me.

Then yesterday my coworker comes in and says "I'm not even mad about the game, I'm mad at you for breaking my mind! All game long I was asking myself what Tebow would have done! I bet Tebow would have hit that deep ball, he was always good at those, I bet Tebow would have scrambled and picked up that first down. FUUUUUUU" Oh man he's so mad. We were talking about the corching search this morning and I said "I'd really love if they hired Urban Meyer and then brought Tebow back" and then I just poured my coffee and strutted away into my office, not even waiting for a reply. The BTT equivalent of a mic drop

 

[Ander1345]

Yeah, I meant as far as passing goes. The run game as a whole was pretty lackluster.

We should just have a 128 team playoff. Just gotta play hot at the right time.

 

[Ander1345]

If you think my Tebow Schtick is relentless on here, you should see me with my work colleagues.

On Friday we were talking about the game and I said "I'm not even going to watch, I'm just going to go ice fishing because I can't take watching another Peyton Manning angry dad face Meltdown making me long for the days of Tebow." Everyone laughed at me.

Then yesterday my coworker comes in and says "I'm not even mad about the game, I'm mad at you for breaking my mind! All game long I was asking myself what Tebow would have done! I bet Tebow would have hit that deep ball, he was always good at those, I bet Tebow would have scrambled and picked up that first down. FUUUUUUU" Oh man he's so mad. We were talking about the corching search this morning and I said "I'd really love if they hired Urban Meyer and then brought Tebow back" and then I just poured my coffee and strutted away into my office, not even waiting for a reply. The BTT equivalent of a mic drop

Talent gets you to the playoffs, guts(Tebow's faith in that case) gets you the championship. Tebow 4 Lyfe.

 

[whiteyc_77]

and i find it funny that everyone is touting OSU as proving they belonged over tcu or baylor. it's not validation.

oh, one of the top teams in the country is capable of beating two other top teams? whale oil beef hooked.

either baylor or tcu could have done the same thing.

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

This is why Vince Young and Tebow would have been NFL gods if their coaches knew enough to stay out of their fucking way with trying to "convert them to the pro game." Nope, just run 6 plays and let that magical dumb asshole troll you all the way to victory.

Awesome post.

Jeff Fisher is such an idiot.

 

[ZeekLTK]

IMO Oregon lost the game on the first possession. Scored a touchdown and then chickened out and kicked a PAT. They go for 2 EVERY GAME when they score an early touchdown like that. Not going for it there was just saying "we're scared, we're not here to win". Sure enough...

 

[fsuprime]

They lost when their fans gave me free beer in 3rd quarter of rose bowl. Can't go around being gracious winners and good losers. This is footbaw

 

[Mame YO]

No, not going for it there was the right call because they didn't have numbers on either side. Herp derp. They also had other tricks (fake punt that they chickened out on) they probably planned on using later.

Not going for that 4th down and kicking a field goal, and not going for it on 4th with 7 minutes left were both bad calls doe.

 

[kella]

There was at least validation among the top 4. Not recursive (e.g., OSU didn't have to play FSU) but still. Better than the BCS. Come like this post, Whitey.

 

[kella]

Might I suggest group play? 3 points for a win, 0 points for a loss, 1 point for MEN OF CHARACTER

 

[Irishman]

If you think my Tebow Schtick is relentless on here, you should see me with my work colleagues.

On Friday we were talking about the game and I said "I'm not even going to watch, I'm just going to go ice fishing because I can't take watching another Peyton Manning angry dad face Meltdown making me long for the days of Tebow." Everyone laughed at me.

Then yesterday my coworker comes in and says "I'm not even mad about the game, I'm mad at you for breaking my mind! All game long I was asking myself what Tebow would have done! I bet Tebow would have hit that deep ball, he was always good at those, I bet Tebow would have scrambled and picked up that first down. FUUUUUUU" Oh man he's so mad. We were talking about the corching search this morning and I said "I'd really love if they hired Urban Meyer and then brought Tebow back" and then I just poured my coffee and strutted away into my office, not even waiting for a reply. The BTT equivalent of a mic drop

The best part is that Manning was making the angry dad face as the ball was being knocked out of his hands. I knew it was all downhill from there.

 

[Irishman]

Wait, so whitey is black?

 

[whiteyc_77]

There was at least validation among the top 4. Not recursive (e.g., OSU didn't have to play FSU) but still. Better than the BCS. Come like this post, Whitey.

 

[whiteyc_77]

Wait, so whitey is black?

Only from the waist down.

-YTC

 

[Southpaw]

 

[OU11]

He's just so happy

 

[Iron]

The song "Centuries" by Fall Out Boy was played a grand total of 45 times across the 3 playoff games.
Rose Bowl: 10 plays
Sugar Bowl: 18 plays
National Championship Game: 17 plays

The stat you are all dying to remember for centuries

 

[Brick]

IMO Oregon lost the game on the first possession. Scored a touchdown and then chickened out and kicked a PAT. They go for 2 EVERY GAME when they score an early touchdown like that. Not going for it there was just saying "we're scared, we're not here to win". Sure enough...

wAt

yes, so scared after that drive.

 

[goblue96]

There was at least validation among the top 4. Not recursive (e.g., OSU didn't have to play FSU) but still. Better than the BCS. Come like this post, Whitey.

16 team triple round robin (home, away, and a Dr. Pepper neutral site location)